Self Defense is not a choice.
It is a reality. Then, before we get to Spikey, what it is about and how to use it, we need to make an honest examination of why self-defense skills are required.
In the USA, sexual harassment occurs every 4 minutes, and rape – every 3 minutes. In my native country of Israel (which is considered safer than America), it is estimated that a third of all women would be sexually harassed at least once in their lifetime, and one in six woman would unfortunately be a victim of rape or attempted rape.
Research has shown that although it is not constantly spoken of, the fear of rape is in fact one of the greatest intimidation factors in the life of most women. The factual and psychological needs for self-defense skills are paramount. In the field of Psychology, it is commonly said of rape that “it is a conscious process of horrifying, through which men hold women in a state of constant fear”. Learning self-defense in general, and Spikey defense in particular, is the process through which a woman can break through this psychological cycle of horror, and attain true and lasting physical confidence in everyday life.
Many markets have arisen to accommodate for women’s need for protection. Tools such as tear gas canisters, electric shockers, knives, and even modified pistols – these things are very common nowadays in women’s purses and pockets. Yet they all have the same issues tagging along with them. Firstly, their carrying or uses are often illegal. Secondly, they are highly dangerous wherein they fall in to the hands of your potential assailant, or when used unprofessionally. A light gust of wind can send the spraying pepper into your face, blinding you in the middle of a sexual assault. A minor mistake aiming a knife or gun can kill a man, and make you stand trial.
No! These are far from being optimal solutions.
You require a feminine instrument of protection, yielding maximum force with a short learning curve. A zero-risk device, which would not depend on things like wind, aim or expertise. An apparatus conceived specifically for use by ladies and girls. Defensive, covert and surprising.
You need Spikey – The perfect device for self defense.
Women as victims: Psychology and thinking
There is a misconception in the whole of society that because women tend to be physically weaker than men, that the result of a sexual assault is almost always predetermined, and in favour of the male assailant. That is not true, and as we shall learn in this course, any woman can, with minimal training, stand on equal grounds with most men.
Nonetheless, because of this bias described, women often walk the streets with fear and anxiety, always looking over their shoulder. This is not a healthy situation, for several reasons:
Stress hurts your emotional and physical well-being.
Stress negatively affects your performance in your profession and personal life.
Stress, anxiety and fear are honed upon by criminals like a shark smells blood. Paradoxically, the more fearful and anxious you are, the more likely you are to fall victim to criminal activity. This is partly why some people (men and women) tend to feel that they too often are victims of other people’s misbehavior. Otherwise known as: “Why does it always happen to ME?!”.
Effective self-defense begins with prevention. Being able to prevent violence consists of the following:
Avoiding places where violence can occur, in the confines of reason and without crippling your ability to live your life to their fullest as you see fit.
Avoiding violent people and their associates. Remember that birds of a feather usually flock together.
Letting go of a victim’s mentality. Believing that through the skills and knowledge attained through this course, you would be able to defend yourself when necessary. It does not have to happen to you.
Embodying your confidence in your ability to defend yourself in your posture and body language at all times.
Remember! Out there are molesters, rapists, sadists, serial killers and who knows what. But there are also killer mosuitos, volcanos, deadly jellyfish, lightnings, poisonous snakes, fast cars, dictators and other threatening and dangerous things. The world is absolutely full of danger, yet the reality of the matter is that most of us will never ever be directly exposed to any of it. Therefore, there is no reason whatsoever to worry of any such dangers in the course of our daily lives. These dangers are out there, but in the context of YOUR life, they are not real until manifested. Therefore, replace your fear and anxiety, as perpetuated by other people and the media, with a newfound determination to be prepared. When you are prepared, there is no reason to worry.
More so, you should not worry of the things you cannot change. A woman does not choose the sexual assailant – he chooses her. You will never know in advance the identity of the person who may attempt to sexually assault you, and frankly, his possible identity does not matter. He is a nobody that does not even exist in your reality at the moment, and will remain an unimportant nobody later too. What is important is not that he exists, but that you are ready to face him. This is what you will learn to do in this course.
Theory through the eyes of an assailant
The aggression of an attacker, statistics and studies
We ought to make a distinction between two types of potential assailants – the random pervert and the professional criminal. The vast majority of men who harass women fall into the first category. They are nothing more but jerks that believe they can get away with speaking inappropriately to women or touching them in a nasty way.
These folks are easier to deal with. You are less likely to find them in a dark ally. Instead, they are found on a crowded street, at the packed mall, in your workplace, on a bus, at a party, etc. They will try to take advantage of you sexually, but oftentimes even a minor threat will deter them immediately. Simply raising your voice against them, calling loudly for help, threatening to call the police or file a complaint to the boss… etc. All sexual harassment is ugly, but most is not inherently dangerous. Usually, the random pervert would be invested in a regular course of life, and these people would have much to lose and in an instant. Make sure to notice then when this is a lesser threat of this kind, and act accordingly. You may be disgusted and shaken, but you have nothing to fear or be anxious about. You can act more rationally with these people.
How to distinguish these ‘causal perverts’ from the really dangerous criminals? As long as you are not yet threatened with violence (verbally or physically), assume you do not need to resort to using it yourself. Be on guard, preferably with your spikey in hand, but do not attack unprovoked. Remember that a vengeful moron can easily sue you in court if you happened to attack him when he merely issued a verbal tease.
Unlike the former, there are the ‘professional’ sexual criminals. These do not have to lead a life of crime or be members of the mafia in order to be distinguished as such. Rather, what makes them different (and rare) is that they are obsessed with the idea with of a sexual assault, and rehearse their plan to execute such assaults. The random pervert is ‘simply’ harassing and crossing boundaries. The sexual criminal is a person who acts like a predatory animal on the hunt, actively and very intentionally looking for a victim.
Criminals of any kind, sexually-oriented or otherwise, have one BIG thing in common with good businessmen and sharks: they can smell blood. In other words, criminals are well trained in looking for opportunities. Are you an opportunity? This you can determine to a great extent! By changing your body language, posture and appearance, you can become far less likely to be the choice of any sexual assailant.
When a group of rapists and date-rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim, these interviews raised a few interesting facts which are important for you to know:
1. The first thing these nasty men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a
woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets. This does not mean that all women should shorten their hair. We ought not change our preferences and lifestyle because of the slim chance this can be risky in this way. Likewise, we do not refuse to eat sugary foods for our entire lives because “it may be dangerous”. That being said, women that fit this description need to be more aware.
2. The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing. This again shows us the major differences between the more common random perverts, and the professional criminals who take care to plan their assault.
3. They will look for women on their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered. Keep this in mind and do not linger endlessly with such things while in the view of others. Make sure you check your surroundings before engaging in such matters. Make it a habit akin to looking left and right before crossing the road.
4. Men are most likely to attack and attempt rape in the early morning, between 5AM and 8:30AM. This is usually when the least amount of people are on the street, and when the woman is most likely to be alone. Attempt to be in the company of others at these times of the day.
5. In America, the number one place women are abducted from or attacked at are grocery store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots and garages. Number three is public restrooms. Be more aware of your environment in such places. Also remember – since these are public spots, there could usually be another person, perhaps many, to whom you can call for help.
6. The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and
quickly move her to another location where they do not have to worry about getting caught. Therefore, it is best to attempt to overcome their assault in the beginning, and not postpone your escape attempt for later. Realize that the place you are headed with them was already conceived as somewhere in which your chances of escaping or calling for help are significantly reduced.
7. A rape charge carries a 3-5~ year sentence in many states, but rape with a weapon will put one for 15-20 years in jail. The interviewed rapists, being professional criminals, were keenly aware of this. Thus, only 2% said they carried weapons with them when they attacked women. That is a very low percentage, that works to your advantage. With the tools given to you in this course, it would be easy for you to overcome an unarmed assailant in many situations. Do not fear he might be carrying a weapon, as this is less likely. Even if threats of a weapon are made, remain skeptical and do not consider your odds until you could try to verify if indeed the assailant is wielding one.
8. The rapists noted that if the intended victim would have put up any fight at all, they would have gotten discouraged. It would only take them a minute or two to realize that your resistance is too time consuming and risk-bearing for them to continue, and they will give up and attempt a future assault on another person instead. Therefore, it seems that in most cases and scenarios, putting up a fight would indeed be the best choice for you.
9. These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands. Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the assailant to use them as a weapon. Though this course is focused on teaching you how to use the spikey, you will also as a consequence learn how to similarly utilize other common objects like pens, lipsticks and even cell phones as potential weapons.
Emotional self-presentation is also very important. Criminals and casual perverts are more likely to approach:
A slouched or hunched woman – walking in this manner signals structural weakness and emotional feebleness.
A crying, sad or sick-looking woman – even on your worst day, attempt to appear strong in public. Let your emotions out when alone or in the company of trusted individuals. Exposing such a state in public makes you very vulnerable to just about anyone seeking to take advantage of you.
A woman featuring extreme shyness and embracement – who is already emotionally distressed to a high degree, thought to have more difficultly dealing with additional pressure.
You do not have to be someone else. Be who you are. You only need to make an effort to pretend you are not vulnerable, to convey the right message.
The sexual criminal thinks himself a predator, but giving heed to the advice so far shared you would not be likely to become his prey. Remember – prevention is 95% of ‘self-defense’. Fear not though, for later in the course we shall learn how even when the assailant assumes you are ‘easy prey’, this works well in your favour, giving you the edge and the element of surprise when defending yourself. A woman who is aware and confident can give any assailant more than he had bargained for.
Recognizing potentially dangerous situations, avoidance & proper preparations
Reading out the preliminary texts or their abstracts.
B. Detailing pressuring situations:
4) Someone acting strange around you.
D. What do you do once you recognize a pressuring situation?
1. Insist on all the principals that you’ve learned when you were young.
2. Avoid insecure situations.
3. In emergencies – call for help!
- Yelling “fire” will be answered quicker than yelling “help”.
- Staying close to crowded areas – sticking to other people on the street.
- It is important to remember that there is no element of pride in an emergency – Cops
also call for backup!
4. The paralyze/shock element:
- Keep your cool.
- Be aware of the situation you’re in – you’re in danger and you need to get out.
- Hold something in your hand (important to demonstrate classic things – such as:
- Keychain, shoe, belt, a stone, a rolled up magazine, a pen, an umbrella – one must use
whatever he can find.)
Defender Aggression – The Switch
“Never stop ‘till the fight is over!”
A. I am aware of the situation, what now?
1) Show self-confidence.
2) Be more aggressive.
3) Understanding the “no more Mr. nice guy” principle.
4) Understanding that you are fighting for your life.
5) Being afraid of imminent danger and death makes me more aware.
6) Knowing what kind of situation you are in… and willing to do
anything to get out of it.
B. If we were surprised:
1) Being able to ‘switch’ will get you out of shock.
2) Being able to hit a key point without fear – nose, throat,
groin, eyes, etc.
C. “Run and Tell”:
1) Getting away is the objective and we’ll do anything to achieve it!
2) In such situations – anything goes.
E. Getting to ‘know’ your potential assailant:
1) The attacker is full of adrenalin before committing the crime – this has implication on how his body and mind will react.
2) The attacker is in some kind of psychotic state of mind – not to be reasoned with.
3) The attacker likely planned the assault beforehand in great detail. This can work to your advantage.